The Evolution Of Man And Woman

[Tortanick]

Well I'm too unique to fit any sterotype, so when people talk about men vs women it dosn't apply to me.

I mix and match charachteristics from both genders: e.g. my two of my greatest loves are hugs and computers.

[lexmarks567]

These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.

[lexmarks567]

Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him what? A super callused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

[poochee]

These friars were behind on their belfry payments, so they opened up a small florist shop to raise funds. Since everyone liked to buy flowers from the men of God, a rival florist across town thought the competition was unfair. He asked the good fathers to close down, but they would not. He went back and begged the friars to close. They ignored him. So, the rival florist hired Hugh MacTaggart, the roughest and most vicious thug in town to "persuade" them to close. Hugh beat up the friars and trashed their store, saying he'd be back if they didn't close up shop. Terrified, they did so, thereby proving that Hugh, and only Hugh, can prevent florist friars.

Hi Lexmarks, funny joke! :bounce:

[lexmarks567]

Hi Lexmarks, funny joke! :bounce:

hi poochee :)

[mommalina]

A teacher was doing a study testing the senses (taste) of first graders using a bowl of lifesavers.

The children began to say:

Red......................Cherry
Yellow.................Lemon
Green...................Lime
Orange................. Orange

Finally the teacher gave them all HONEY lifesavers.

After eating them, none of the children could identify the taste.

"Well," she said, "I will give you all a clue. It's what your mother may
sometimes call your father."

One little girl looked up in horror, spit her lifesaver out and yelled,

"Oh, my God, they're a$$ holes!

[lexmarks567]

A husband and his wife were in the heat of passion when Timmy, their 8 year old son opens the bedroom door and sees his parents. Alarmed but silent, Timmy leaves and goes to watch some TV.
Mom quickly dresses in order to talk to Timmy to find out if he ahd seen anything and what he saw. Hoping to set Timmy's mind at ease, Timmy's mom asked him what he saw. Timmy replies, "I saw you on top of Dad jumping up and down."
Mom says, "Do you know why I do that? I do that because dad needs some help getting his big belly to go down, so I jump up and down on it to get it flat."
Timmy says, " You're wasting your time."
"Why?" Mom asks.
"Well," Timmy responds, " when you are gone to the store, that neighbor lady comes over, gets on her knees and blows it back up again."